TGIF!

I have fallen into "stay at home mom" status. This shit is hard. It seems to me that my only break during the day was at my part time job. I don't know what day of the week it is, I don't really worry about the time of day since Joshua has been home all this week too. The days and the hours just blend all together and I feel like I'm in a tornado. Today is Friday? Are you kidding me? I seem to have way more to do than I used to. Cheers! to stay at home moms. This is kicking my butt.

Last Friday was a mental health emergency. I have been exasperating for the last few weeks and Friday my head felt so jumbled and my head felt like it was full of ants. That's the only way I can explain it. I can tell when I'm hypo manic because I lose sleep. Long story short, I was sent on my way with some medication, instructions to see him on Monday, Mom was told to stay with me while Joshua was working and for me to get some rest. The medication worked over night. My mind felt at ease the next morning. Mom spent the weekend with me. It was a treat to have her spend the night and wake up in the mornings with her. Sunday night before bed, Asa walked into his bedroom and said "where's Beya? She isn't here?". He loved it too. Monday I went in for a follow up and felt great. I thanked God all weekend for doctors, medication and the ability to fight and struggle for our lives. I am thankful that there is a medication that I can take WHEN I need it when my serotonin levels are all messed up.

Monday morning at my follow up appointment with the doctor, he was looking down at my file, kind of paused and said "OK Trina...we are going to have to be careful here...because the main side effect of this medication is weight gain." REALLY????? THAT EXPLAINS IT!! . Over the weekend I had never been so hungry in my entire life. My weekend was filled with baking and cooking. I had never been a better cook or baker until the weekend. I had no idea what was wrong with me, but it seemed as if I had never eaten any good food until the weekend. I pulled out an old bread maker from the garage and have baked EVERY SINGLE DAY since Friday of last week. Not sure what I'm baking today...hmmmm....I was very surprised how many things you can make with a bread maker! Cinnamon Roll dough, Orange roll dough, Challah bread dough...then there's baked bread...Oatmeal bread, Whole wheat berry bread, French Bread. I have recently expanded my knowledge of bread making with the bread machine to include quickbreads. I made Chocolate pound cake last night at 9pm. It will not be my last quick bread in the bread makeer I assure you. I have stopped taking the medication, but knowing that I'm such a great cook and bread maker has fired me up to cook. Oy vey.

Asa had basketball on Wednesday. He is horrible. I just hang my head and shake it and when Asa makes eye contact with me, he give me the "thumbs up" signal. I just signal back. He likes it and that's all that matters. He did tell the coach when we got there "I don't dribble very much because I'm not good at it like the other kids, but it's OK, I still have fun". It melted my heart. I didn't think he knew he was terrible. When we talk about it, I just tell him that he looked like he was having fun and he always agrees with me. It will be over in 2 weeks. 2 long weeks.

Yesterday, mom, papa and Valentina came and picked up Asa and they were off to Goldendale. That left Joshua and I free to watch not-age appropriate TV and go out for happy hour. We went to Rock Bottom for pretzels and beer and then stopped off at a dive bar that recently opened near our home. We were home by 7pm. I know, we are crazy people and we run with the wolves. After we got home, we got to watch more fun TV. Heaven.

The weather has sucked, it's been wet and cold so we haven't spent much time outside. Asa is getting spring fever and has his baseball mitt and bat out and plays pretend baseball inside. Sad.

The Upside Down Show has been replaced with Junkyard Wars. Asa and I love to watch that for an hour in the morning. I never thought the day would come when he would rather watch the Science Channel or NatGeo before Noggin. He still changes the channel to Noggin sometimes, but loses interest quickly. He has been helping me bake too. He is so much fun at this age. He has learned to copy what we say and he thinks he's pretty funny. I remember doing that to my mom when I was younger and thinking it was so funny. Pay back is a bitch.

Asa's TV has been cut to 1 1/2 hours per day. Period. My computer time has been cut down to 1 1/2 hours per day. Period. I haven't been blogging much, or Facebooking much since I have put this restriction on myself, but it does give me more time to bake and cook.

My son will be home soon and I have yet to bake today, so I must hurry so I can have his "best bread in the universe Mum Mum!" bread ready for him. I tell you...baking and cooking for boys that really appreciate it is really special. I am blessed.

What a difference a week makes. I feel great today. Not hypo manic, not sad, not anxious. I feel mellow. I don't take it for granted.


Shake N Bake!